Thursday, March 31, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Teaching Consequences
I am so proud to see my Children seeing contrasts and comparisons. They say the brain doesn't fully understand cause and effect, or consequences until the person is around 21.
Now, I believe this is very likely, and unfortunately that makes the next 15 years or more relatively daunting.
But at their young ages, I DO see them seeing contrast and comparisons of what consequences and scenarios they like and don't like.
They can tell you that they like the way I do certain things. They can tell you that they would prefer a cookie to a spanking. And we are teaching (slowly but consistently) that a cookie is likely to follow good behavior, and a spanking is likely to follow poor behavior. I teach my children early and consistently that my job is to prepare, teach, protect and help them to be happy. That it applies to all of them, and if they are doing things that are unsafe to either themselves or the other members of our Family, they have to be stopped.
Their feelings matter. Their feelings are important. However, their feelings come 2nd to their (and others) safety.
Elizabeth burst into tears once when I told her that for everyone's sake, I would not be handling the situation we were dealing with anymore. That her dad would be. When asked why she was so upset, she said that it's because he's "a lot meaner" than I am. I informed her that since she wasn't cooperating with ME, she was going to deal with him. She knew she didn't like that alternative, and that to avoid it in the future would require her changing how she dealt with the situation.
So, we may be taking baby steps now, but I see the lights turning on, and really that's all I need right now ;-)
Now, I believe this is very likely, and unfortunately that makes the next 15 years or more relatively daunting.
But at their young ages, I DO see them seeing contrast and comparisons of what consequences and scenarios they like and don't like.
They can tell you that they like the way I do certain things. They can tell you that they would prefer a cookie to a spanking. And we are teaching (slowly but consistently) that a cookie is likely to follow good behavior, and a spanking is likely to follow poor behavior. I teach my children early and consistently that my job is to prepare, teach, protect and help them to be happy. That it applies to all of them, and if they are doing things that are unsafe to either themselves or the other members of our Family, they have to be stopped.
Their feelings matter. Their feelings are important. However, their feelings come 2nd to their (and others) safety.
Elizabeth burst into tears once when I told her that for everyone's sake, I would not be handling the situation we were dealing with anymore. That her dad would be. When asked why she was so upset, she said that it's because he's "a lot meaner" than I am. I informed her that since she wasn't cooperating with ME, she was going to deal with him. She knew she didn't like that alternative, and that to avoid it in the future would require her changing how she dealt with the situation.
So, we may be taking baby steps now, but I see the lights turning on, and really that's all I need right now ;-)
Sunday, March 27, 2011
A Tree
I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree.
A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;
A tree that looks at God all day,
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;
A tree that may in Summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;
Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.
Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
by Alfred Joyce Kilmer
A poem lovely as a tree.
A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the earth's sweet flowing breast;
A tree that looks at God all day,
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;
A tree that may in Summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;
Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.
Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
by Alfred Joyce Kilmer
Friday, March 25, 2011
I thought of you so much today
I went to God in prayer,
To ask Him to watch over you
And show you that I care.
My prayer for you was not for rewards
That you could touch or feel,
But true rewards for happiness
That are so very real.
Like love and understanding
In all the things you do,
And guidance when you need it most
To see your troubles through.
I asked Him for good health for you
So your future could be bright,
And faith to accept life's challenges
And the courage to do what's right.
I gave thanks to Him
For granting my prayer
To bring you peace and love.
May you feel the warmth in your life
With God's blessings from above
I went to God in prayer,
To ask Him to watch over you
And show you that I care.
My prayer for you was not for rewards
That you could touch or feel,
But true rewards for happiness
That are so very real.
Like love and understanding
In all the things you do,
And guidance when you need it most
To see your troubles through.
I asked Him for good health for you
So your future could be bright,
And faith to accept life's challenges
And the courage to do what's right.
I gave thanks to Him
For granting my prayer
To bring you peace and love.
May you feel the warmth in your life
With God's blessings from above
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
If I could
If I Could
I'd protect you from the sadness in your eyes
give you courage in a world of compromise
yes I would
If I could
I would teach you all the things I've never learned
and I'd help you cross the bridges that I've burned
yes I would
if I could
I would try to shield your innocence from time
but the part of life I gave you isn't mine
I've watched you grow
so I could let you go
if I could
I would help you make it through the hungry years
but I know that I can never cry your tears
but I would
if I could
if I live in a time and place where you don't want to be
you don't have to walk along this road with me
my yesterday won't have to be your way
if I knew
how I'd try to change the world I brought you to
and there isn't very much that I can do
but I would
if I could
if I could
I would try to shield your innocence from time
but that part of life I gave you isn't mine
I watched you grow so I could let you go
if, if I could
I would help you make it through those hungry years
but I know that I can never cry your tears
but I would
if I could
yes I would
yes I would
if I could
I'd protect you from the sadness in your eyes
give you courage in a world of compromise
yes I would
If I could
I would teach you all the things I've never learned
and I'd help you cross the bridges that I've burned
yes I would
if I could
I would try to shield your innocence from time
but the part of life I gave you isn't mine
I've watched you grow
so I could let you go
if I could
I would help you make it through the hungry years
but I know that I can never cry your tears
but I would
if I could
if I live in a time and place where you don't want to be
you don't have to walk along this road with me
my yesterday won't have to be your way
if I knew
how I'd try to change the world I brought you to
and there isn't very much that I can do
but I would
if I could
if I could
I would try to shield your innocence from time
but that part of life I gave you isn't mine
I watched you grow so I could let you go
if, if I could
I would help you make it through those hungry years
but I know that I can never cry your tears
but I would
if I could
yes I would
yes I would
if I could
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Mockingjay
Mockingjay by Suzanne CollinsMy rating: 4 of 5 stars
Finished the series off well, but wasn't as captivating as the first
View all my reviews
Catching Fire
Catching Fire by Suzanne CollinsMy rating: 4 of 5 stars
Great, but lost some luster from the 1st book
View all my reviews
If you think I Home School because I'm lazy...
Ginger made the comment that I only Home School because I am too lazy to get up in the mornings to get E to School.
Well, here is an example of just How lazy I am:
Today I spent 2 hours on Math with E. She randomly forgot her numbers from 70 to 100. And there was a Math problem that read: "What Number is 10 less than 99?"
Long story short, after having her count forward and backward between 80 and 100 many times, and taking several "mental health" breaks, we got it.
Now you need to understand that she KNOWS this. And I KNOW she does because I work with her weekly if not daily on it, and every other time, she's not had a single problem. And she had just easily and correctly answered 10 other problems JUST like it.
For most parents, they send their child to school, where the teacher does this. But I don't know ANY situations where a teacher with 15+ students can spend 2 hours working through one math problem like this. So there is the option of tutoring.
Well, I'm called lazy, but I do it all myself. And E is at performance level if not above most 1st Graders.
Well, here is an example of just How lazy I am:
Today I spent 2 hours on Math with E. She randomly forgot her numbers from 70 to 100. And there was a Math problem that read: "What Number is 10 less than 99?"
Long story short, after having her count forward and backward between 80 and 100 many times, and taking several "mental health" breaks, we got it.
Now you need to understand that she KNOWS this. And I KNOW she does because I work with her weekly if not daily on it, and every other time, she's not had a single problem. And she had just easily and correctly answered 10 other problems JUST like it.
For most parents, they send their child to school, where the teacher does this. But I don't know ANY situations where a teacher with 15+ students can spend 2 hours working through one math problem like this. So there is the option of tutoring.
Well, I'm called lazy, but I do it all myself. And E is at performance level if not above most 1st Graders.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Everyone is different
Sometimes we need to realize that we aren't the same as everyone else. We may often be offended by the fact that someone didn't send a Thank You note, and miss the ways they are showing their gratitude. What YOU do to say "Thank You" may not be the same for your neighbor.
You may religiously send out Thank You notes. While the person you did a kind deed for may instead be ready and willing to bring over a meal any time you need it.
How much do we miss out on if we constantly focus on how we would LIKE things to be done. How many tender mercies do we overlook while looking for that perfect show of appreciation?
Sometimes, Thank you notes are not what is needed. Sometimes our Children being taken to the park when we need a break, or a meal brought over when our hearts are too broken to make a meal is even better than that piece of paper we're upset we didn't get.
You may religiously send out Thank You notes. While the person you did a kind deed for may instead be ready and willing to bring over a meal any time you need it.
How much do we miss out on if we constantly focus on how we would LIKE things to be done. How many tender mercies do we overlook while looking for that perfect show of appreciation?
Sometimes, Thank you notes are not what is needed. Sometimes our Children being taken to the park when we need a break, or a meal brought over when our hearts are too broken to make a meal is even better than that piece of paper we're upset we didn't get.
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