Lost Virtues

Forgiveness is so UNDER rated now a days. I've said it before, and I'll say it again.... so is Empathy!

If one could see the effects of their actions through another's eyes. Feel the effects through another's heart, Would they be so hasty as to wound and judge.

I realized something last night. That those of my Friends who know the WHOLE story, are still around. While those who only know 2/3rds are not.

I believe it may mean that A) Those who have been told the whole story are able to grasp a deeper level of truth and existence, there by making them more understanding, and less likely to judge what takes place on the surface. Or B) I am really hard to understand, and those who know the whole story have all the pieces which makes understanding me and the situation easier. Or Both.

What's interesting is that I write it all down. If you're reading this you have either heard the stories first hand, heard the stories second hand, or read about them in this blog. It's ALL here. But those who I have not DIRECTLY told, don't seem to know it.

I hide NOTHING. I protect myself as much as I can while keeping to what I feel is MY code of ethics: Integrity.

I have nothing to hide, thus I hide NOTHING. I WILL protect my family though, and if you pose a threat, I will NOT give you ammunition.

I guess you could say that I speak in parables often. So, I guess those who have ears to hear, and eyes to see, do. And those who have not the fortitude to discern, miss out.

Back to the original point. Why are forgiveness and empathy so difficult to come by?

I try to understand others perspective, and judge liberally vs rashly. (do NOT misunderstand. I admit freely that I can REACT rashly. But to actually have that action be my final judgement is RARE)

And I've noticed that forgiveness is an INCREDIBLY rare commodity. People hold the smallest offenses over you eternally now days. But I am realizing that people who can't forgive others almost NEVER have the ability to forgive THEMSELVES. So I guess at least they're consistent on that one.

So, do not judge...leave that to God. Have empathy. And forgive.... YOURSELF and that might make it so much easier to forgive OTHERS!!!!

Control?

Today's WONDEROUS epiphany:

Being in control of your life is acting appropriately because you can. Staying calm because you can. Being kind because you can.

NOT

Acting inappropriately, getting flustered, or being unkind because you can.

Instead of eating CRAP because you CAN, eat Healthy because you CAN. Because you can do whatever YOU want to.

Instead of executing justice because you can, leave it to the Law and God.... Because you CAN.

No one controls you. No one has that power... and since you ARE the one who decides and can do whatever the HELL you want, show TRUE control!

Writer/Reader Trust

Let's talk about this for a second:

I write down the things that are going on in my life and my feelings, and I keep my blog open for anyone to read because A) It helps me be a stronger, healthier person. B) I hope it may help someone else. And C) Because I am NOT perfect, but I have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING I am ashamed of, or need to hide.

But I in turn trust that if you are reading my Blog, it is because you either care about me, are interested in what I have to say (because it has value), or I am helping you.

If this is not the case, you need to go mind your own business.

I do NOT think it is fair for me to open up the way I do, and then hear that it is Playground Gossip.

ESPECIALLY those of you who keep your life completely private and share NOTHING.

I will not be going private, but I will not be bullied. I will not play High School; and I will NOT play that I am part of the "Mean Girls" scenario, and am the hopeless victim.

I am a GREAT asset to people who matter and value me. And I am CERTAINLY not any worse at being a Friend, Wife, Mom, Daughter or any other Relationship type function than those of you who are using my blog for entertainment or to gossip about.

You know if it's you.

You know if it's not.

You know and I know. Just remember that.

And to those of you who read this for the reasons that I started with. Thank you for your support and I hope I have helped you in some way.

To those of you who are malicious about your intentions, SERIOUSLY! Don't you have anything better to do? Your not perfect, and your self esteem must SUCK!

PLEASE do yourself and everyone.... especially your KIDS a favor, and find a better use of your time and attention.

My Cherry Beer Cake

1 Cup Samuel Adams Cherry Wheat Beer

1 Stick of Butter

3 Eggs

1 Butter Golden Duncan Hines cake mix

2 Cups chopped Maraschino Cherries

Bring Beer and Butter to a mild boil

Pour into bowl

Beat in eggs and finally cake mix until smooth

Grease and Flour Bundt Pan

Evenly distribute 1 cup of the cherries in the bottom of the pan

Pour in batter

Evenly distribute 2nd cup of cherries around the top (they will sink to the bottom)

Bake @ 350 degrees for EXACTLY 35 minutes

Sigh!

I got Jacob to take a nap. And Abby to lay down with me.... they are both now sleeping. The older Girls are peacefully playing, so I closed my eyes, and began to drift. And I get a tap on my shoulder. Elysia needed me RIGHT away.

No nap, I guess.

Check out My Mommy Blog

I keep a Blog specifically about My Kids. Check out the latest

Today's advice

1) If you avoid cooking with alcohol because you think it's against the "Word of Wisdom," You're totally missing out. There is ZERO alcohol in the finished product. When you heat (bake, boil, etc) the beer or whatever Liquor you are using, the alcohol is taken out leaving a totally unique flavor. Suffice it to say that there are many more things like Beer Cake on our horizon here.

2) Don't call DFS on me. You won't have a case, and you'll look bad! And if I EVER found out, you'd have some major crap coming your way.

With that said, Have a GREAT day! ;-)

A ♪ On how I Handle Government Meddling

SOOOOOO DFS showed up at my door today. Two SUPER nice Ladies, but DFS none the less. The situation they are "Investigating" is "Neglect of Elizabeth's Education."

I PROUDLY, albeit FLUSTERED, took them to my computer and showed them HARD proof that she is attending school.

Now I don't know WHO got the School District involved in our business. And I don't know WHY NOW. But I do have a pretty good guess at what "bothered" the person (s) and why they may have thought I was neglecting her education.

I WILL say that they do not know ME at ALL!!!!!!!!!!

I am NOT one of those"Mothers" who have children because that's what "You" do.

I am not one of those who is uneducated, and lays down because it feels "good" and 9 months later, out pops a baby, and I shrug my shoulders and look blank.

I haven't gotten pregnant unintentionally since 2001. I actually have TRIED to get pregnant before with ZERO success. Twice I have miscarried when I was ready and WANTED to have a baby.

I sit down with my partner, and we discuss that if we have a sexual relationship with out protection, a Baby just might come from it.

I have had partners who have been in charge of the birth control. If they want to have a sexual relationship without a baby, they need to take some of the responsibility. Two people need to make an educated decision, and take responsibility for that decision. This is how I handle procreation. It is a Gift. It is something to be handled with responsibility, and you need to either willingly deal with the consequences, or not participate.

That being said, 5 times, David and I have said "Let's have a Baby." We have 4 Children. I would dare say that the numbers add up to 4 CONSCIOUS decisions to have the Child that came from the actions.

I make VERY sure that my 4 Children are taken care of. I stay home because that is how I can benefit them the most. My last post addressed this as well.

I feed my Children, I clothe them, I bathe them, I take them to the Dr., I take them to the Dentist, I make sure they have their teeth brushed, I make sure they have clean clothes and bedding, I make sure they have warm coats and hats and gloves. I make sure they eat good foods. I take them to Play group when I can. I take them on vacation, and to do fun things when I can.

And after experiencing what Public School outside of our home was like with Elizabeth, and how she reacted to it, we decided to handle her education at home.

And it has its pros and cons like everything in life.

But this year, it's what we are doing. And I have Elizabeth registered with Wyoming Virtual Academy, which is Public Online Schooling. They set the curriculum, they monitor her attendance, and progress and she meets online with her teacher every Wed.

Someone, who no doubt sees her out and about and just existing with me, I guess decided that she does NOTHING school related all day every day, and I just don't bother taking her to school. And tipped off her School District in Green River. They looked to make sure they had the forms on file saying that she was being homeschooled.... which someone has misplaced. So, the School District called DFS.

DUDE! Mind YOUR own business and tend to your OWN problems people. I KNOW whomever called the District is NOT someone who is actively involved in her life. Which means they don't actually care about HER. Or our Family. They just want to tattle. Because I KNOW Wendy, who helps out when our car breaks down, or Kerry who runs me to the store or helps me pack and has me watch her kids or has her daughter watch mine, or Stayce who's husband works with David every day didn't do it, or Ivy who comes to our rescue over and over didn't do it. The people who know our every day business and are either actively involved in helping mold our Family's character or mind their business because what we do isn't affecting them didn't do it. It was someone who doesn't even interact with Elizabeth on a weekly basis if ever. Someone who I would never have knock on my door just because.

It's again like the story of the Little Red Hen. If you don't want to be an active part of the baking process (part of our lives on a regular and consistent basis), don't ask for some of the finished product and CERTAINLY don't complain about the way it turns out!

And as for the District, or DFS, there is no case. They have nothing to back it up. They have seen the hard, indisputable evidence that her education is not being neglected. So HOPEFULLY we're done with that!

You Find Out Who Your Friends Are

Morality and running your mouth

I've had a lot to go over the past few days. Starting with 2 Friends who lied to me to not have to admit the real reason they were sitting home on a Saturday night when I was having a party they were invited to.

Ending with learning about the real reason another Friend didn't want me getting too close to another potential Friend.

Ultimately, I deleted another round of Friends from FB.

The 2 that lied have been removed. I think that is the lowest form of morality (besides the OBVIOUS murder and violating innocent people). To flat out lie to someone because you are a coward shows that you have a low self esteem, and are willing to do whatever it takes to protect your ability to lick your wounds no matter the cost to someone else.

The one that stays is the one who has done some really not nice things, but has NEVER tried to lie to me about them.

A little story for that one though:

One Day, a man went to jail. He was told bond was a fine of $100. He paid the $1oo which he had in his pocket. They then informed him that he owed $5. And would hold him until that $5 was paid.

At home, his wife had $5. In his car (which was their only car, and was parked where he had been arrested) was $10 in change. But he wasn't at home, and his wife didn't have immediate access to the car which was a good 5 miles away and she would either need to get a ride to the car, or walk.

So, they called a Friend who was willing to save them the middle hassle and just take $5 straight to the jail, and pick up the husband. They had a solid Friendship so paying back the money later was no problem.

It wasn't that they were MINUS the measly $5. It's that they had the wonderful treasure of a Friend who would make life a bit easier where she could.

Therefore, they were rich indeed. For they HAD the $5, and a Friend on top of it.

People criticized saying "How do you not have $5 to get yourself out of jail? Yet the wife doesn't work, and you keep having more kids. You have no money to take care of your kids."

Here is the response the wife had:

My Children mean more to me than an extra $5 or even $1000. The value of their well being cannot be matched with money. They do not care whether they have the best or most expensive in clothes, cars, homes, movies, games, or vacations.

They care that their Mother cared enough about them to give up the high paying high ranking military career and stay home with them. To personally mold and shape who they would become. She made mistakes, but she did it with love. She had to tell them "no" sometimes, but they KNEW she had their best interest in mind.

They had what they needed... including that extra $5 when they needed it, and the hour delay in daddy getting that money had no lasting effects on the happiness in the family.

This mother and father were never unable to feed, clothe, and care for all of the children in a manner which was adequate. They got to buy new things, take trips, go to movies.

Because to them, the extra $50,000 + a year was not worth denying the children their mother on a daily basis.

And they LOVE their children, and believe that another one would be a blessing not an obligation.

My Blog, My Words

I feel like SHIT! I hate when Mommy gets sick! We should be exempt!

Happy New Year

I don't really have time to blog right now. Our computer is not set up at home yet. So QUICK recap of recent events.

We are in our new home. We LOVE it. 3 bedrooms, 2 full bathrooms. I am sore and bruised from LOTS of falls (since we moved in the most horid temperatures with lots of snow and ice on the ground) and lifting and moving lots of heavy stuff. Plus last night, I ran my leg into the corner of our bed so hard, I thought I HAD to have broken something.

Life is in full swing at our new apartment. I got it organized FAST but that is partially due to sending EVERYTHING I could to storage.

Jacob is ADORABLE but under foot every second. I feel bad because he gets yelled at a lot right now. He can open the EVERY door in our new place, so it's insane trying to keep him out.

Elizabeth and Elysia have one bedroom, and then Jacob and Abby share the 3rd. Bedtime is sooooo nice with the children separated.

We like the convenience of living in Rock Springs.