Philadelphia and Life Choices

David and I just watched the movie "Philadelphia" with Tom Hanks. Movies that I have seen as a Teen/Young Adult have a totally different impact now that I am a Parent. Watching Philadelphia reiterates how much I just want My Children to be safe. I have said before that while the idea of My Girls coming home and telling me as a Teen that they are pregnant is not pleasant, it's not pregnancy that I worry about, it's them being unsafe and through one moment of recklessness, catching a life altering illness and paying for it with their life. Fortunately, the methods that prevent such disease also prevent unwanted pregnancy.

I look back at my life choices, and there are some that were just so needlessly stupid, and even reckless. And all of them have affected the opportunities I've had and the way my life has ultimately turned out. And for this reason, I wouldn't change them Per Se. I would however prefer the easier way to the end result by way of making wiser decisions. But "C'est la vie, Ainsi va la vie."

I have come to realize that some of our best decisions, and the ones that matter most, are often ones so impactual that we question them EVERY day. I questioned the choice to not marry a certain young man for years. Questioned my choice to marry David. To Divorce David. To Remarry David. To have my 4 children.... to or to not have more. And the final decisions in all that I have seen some sort of end result, I have to say were the right decision. But I question them still because the effects are that life changing.

I am grateful for the influence of God in my life. I am grateful for the faith I have that has helped me to persevere despite my questioning. I am grateful for the choice I made to be with David.... and to divorce him... then to be with him again.

I am grateful for every Baby I have, and do NOT feel that I am done. Therefore, I am grateful that both David and I are willing to NOT put a period where The Lord seems to have just put a comma.

I seriously hope that I will be able to instill in My Children the need to be safe... above all. I pray for their safety through the tough decisions they will make. And I pray that in the end, they will be as satisfied as I am with the end result.