Mathew 25

34 Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:

35 For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

41 Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:

42 For I was an hungered, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink:

43 I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.

44 Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?

45 Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me.

46 And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal.

Our Garden ...2012 in Review (AKA Our Christmas Letter)

This has been a busy year for us. We have been adjusting to life back in Utah, and with Friends Old and New.

Here's just a glimpse at what we've been up to:

David, or Daddy as he's known around here, loves working for Halliburton. He is gone for approx 14 days, and then home for anywhere from 5 to 7 days after that. He works hard, and spends a lot of time on the road but this job provides pretty well for our Family of 7. He enjoys Football. His Favorite team is the Baltimore Ravens, and he's even got us watching Sunday Night Football on occasion. ;-)

Candace, we call her Mommy, keeps busy Home Schooling, Babysitting, running several Independent Consultant type businesses, and taking Kids to Soccer, Dance, and Music Class. She's constantly experimenting in the kitchen. Fortunately with a 99% success rate. She loves to have people over, hike, and keep David busy with spontaneous Family Outings during his week home. She also has become a Football Fan, favoring the New Orleans Saints.

Elizabeth (age 9) is in the middle of her 2nd year playing Soccer. It is an activity that she loves, and really is beginning to excel at. She loves to be a Mini Mommy. And she and Mommy have a lot of fun watching movies, and hanging out together. She's Mommy's 2nd set of hands, and helps out a lot with Jacob and Bella. She's even been able to apprentice baby sit a couple of times with our Friend, Celeste, and her Cousin, Kayla. She made some great strides over the Summer getting over her fears at Lagoon with Daddy, Mommy, and Kayla.

Elysia (age 8) has been in Dance for 6 years now. How time flies! She is sharp as a tack and keeps us entertained with her genius comments and ideas. She was able to be Baptized by Her Daddy on December 8th. She is a big help with Bella also. This year, she and Mommy got to Lagoon together for Mommy's Class Reunion, where she showed a passion for thrill water rides. She is a good reader, and picks up on math easily.

Abigail (age 6) is Our Special Abby. She keeps us guessing ;-) We like to tease her and call her "Bob". a nickname that came from getting her hair cut into a "bob". She is the Middle Child, and still kind of finding her "niche". She DID start Dance this year, and that motivated her to FINALLY potty train. She LOVES Dance Class, and is blossoming! She got to go to The Forgotten Carols with Mommy... just the 2 of them (though they joined Grandpa, Grandma, The Petersons, and Rockwoods)for her Birthday in a Special new dress that she got just for the occasion.

Jacob (age 3) is Our BOY! He is NOTHING like his sisters. He spends his days tormenting them, and finding new and creative ways to be independent and get into mischief. He LOVES to cuddle and dote on Bella... when he's not stealing her cup, binkie, or toys. He knows his colors, and excels with electronics and figuring out puzzles. He LOVES bonding with Daddy over Football and Soccer.

Arabella (Bella... 15 Months) Is A D O R A B L E and SPUNKY!!!! She holds her own being the youngest of 5. She is observant and knows a lot. She LOVES outings, and especially being in our Back Pack that we use for hiking. She is very independent and likes to explore... but not too far away from Mommy. She LOVES her Daddy (a little bit of a surprise with how much of her life he's been gone). And has a very "pet of the family" life.

As a Family, we enjoy watching movies... some of our Favorites are Pitch Perfect, The Twilight Saga, Harry Potter, and just about ANY musical; Glee, and Once Upon a Time together. We have also enjoyed the ability to have Zoo and Aquarium memberships to keep us busy. And have done a good bit of hiking as well. We like Sports, and traveling and hope to make both a more active part of the coming year.

David and Candace got to go see Wicked at the Capitol Theater, and The Kids really enjoy listening to the soundtrack for that and other musicals like Les Miserables, Hairspray, and Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat. For New Year's Eve, David, Candace, Elizabeth and Elysia have tickets to go see Wicked's Kristin Chenoweth in Park City and are really excited.

We miss our Wyoming Friends, but were blessed to spend Thanksgiving In Green River with the Kropfs and have a few visits from them throughout the year, including a very special Musical Number and Talk by Ivy and Sarah at Elysia's Baptism.

We are very happy to be closer to Family, and have enjoyed spending this past year getting better acquainted with cousins. Candace has had the privilege of Babysitting for David's sister, Deborah most Tuesdays. It's been fun to have David's brother, Dan's Girls go on outings and have sleepovers. And David and Dan's son, Sean are buddies.

Candace's Mom, GG, has been very involved in helping out with Our Crazy Bunch. And we are very grateful to be close to her.

For the 4th Of July, Candace, Elizabeth, and Abby got to spend the night downtown at the parade with Candace's Cousins, Katie and Randy's Girls and A Friend, Kristy. A tradition from Candace's Childhood that she was excited to share with Her Children.

We love the area and Ward (Church Congregation) we are in, and have made some great Friends.

This year has been one of sacrifice and reward for us. And at this Special Time of Year, we are Grateful to be a Family and for Our Savior... His life, and His Atonement for us.

We are grateful for all of you who take time for us, and show you care whether it be through kind words, helping out with kids, joining us in our outings, keeping us busy, or celebrating with us. You hold a special place in our hearts.

May God Bless you and Yours in the coming year!

December 8, 2012

The end of The World... December 2012

I SWORE no more political posts on FB this year ;) BUT that was when I thought we'd be able to make it through 60 days without people shooting children and the President ... well. So since I'm trying to keep the politics away from there, and it's Christmas time, I'll post here:

Let's look at this logically: 1) Let's reduce military force for the 2nd most hated (by those who are jealous or have ever been screwed over by) country in the world. And then 2) Take guns a...way from every law abiding citizen. Does ANYONE know what that's a recipe for??? COOKED GOOSE (AKA Dead or Captive Americans by the millions!!!!)

Wyoming just passed a law making it illegal to take their guns.... it's their right to hunt. And I don't imagine many gun carrying Americans are giving up their right to bear arms without shooting everyone who tries to take their guns.

Tomorrow may not be the end of the world. But the future looks bleak in Our Country!!!!

In another time it was said "I have a plan. It will save every man. I will force them to live righteously.But give all the glory to me."

Would I Give MY Life?

I was thinking about it in the tub last night... Death terrifies me. Not passing from this life to the next. The trauma of what would have to happen to my body in order to make me pass. How much pain it would take before my body would not be able to function on ANY level again. If it were as simple as passing painlessly in my sleep, it would not terrify me. I can make my peace with God.

Well, that's not 100% true. I AM terrified of leaving My Children unprotected.

So, if I was face to face with a terrorist and it was my life or innocent children that were not my own, would I sacrifice my life for theirs.

OF COURSE I would!!!

And I know that should be a no brainer from any half decent adult. But it was a moment of truth for me.

And I'm glad to know I would.

I'm glad I can be a person of honor when push comes to shove.

Invites

It's kind of funny. I'm not a Cynic. Though I might be viewed as one by some. And I am neither negative or a Pessimist. I am a REALIST. Actually, a pretty sharp one at that.

And when I invite people to things, I already KNOW who will say what. There are variables, of course... The excuses vary slightly. But there are NO surprises.

Post 667

I have to post just to change the #. Before this post, I have 666 posts. And that cannot stay.

SOOOOOOOOOO

I will be posting about GOD as I tip the scales ;-)

I read a post by Ginger about following instincts.

And I am grateful today for a Mother who taught me by example how to listen, and then without shame follow those instincts. Or Promptings.

And it became a part of who I am.

SO much so that it is 2nd nature for me.

And no matter HOW many people tell me I'm foolish. No matter WHO tells me I am wrong, I go with what I feel is the right answer. Not the popular answer. After all, God isn't telling them how I need to handle the situation... it doesn't apply to them. It's specific to ME!

And I am so very grateful for the promptings that have lead me to where I am.

Holly said once,"I hope your kids don't resent you for keeping them home rather than sending them to school." And at THAT moment, I KNEW that my choice to NOT send them was not just MY thoughts. Because I new at that moment that if I DID send them, I was going against my very core instincts. And I KNOW I would regret going against my CORE instincts!!!!!

COLUMBINE STUDENT'S FATHER 12 YEARS LATER !!

Guess our national leaders didn't expect this. On Thursday, Darrell Scott, the father of Rachel Scott, a victim of the Columbine High School shootings in Littleton, Colorado, was invited to address the House Judiciary Committee's subcommittee. What he said to our national leaders during this special session of Congress was painfully truthful.

They were not prepared for what he was to say, nor was it received well. It needs to be heard by every parent, every teacher, every politician, every sociologist, every psychologist, and every so-called expert! These courageous words spoken by Darrell Scott are powerful, penetrating, and deeply personal. There is no doubt that God sent this man as a voice crying in the wilderness.. The following is a portion of the transcript:

"Since the dawn of creation there has been both good & evil in the hearts of men and women. We all contain the seeds of kindness or the seeds of violence. The death of my wonderful daughter, Rachel Joy Scott, and the deaths of that heroic teacher, and the other eleven children who died must not be in vain. Their blood cries out for answers.

"The first recorded act of violence was when Cain slew his brother Abel out in the field. The villain was not the club he used.. Neither was it the NCA, the National Club Association. The true killer was Cain, and the reason for the murder could only be found in Cain's heart.

"In the days that followed the Columbine tragedy, I was amazed at how quickly fingers began to be pointed at groups such as the NRA. I am not a member of the NRA. I am not a hunter. I do not even own a gun. I am not here to represent or defend the NRA - because I don't believe that they are responsible for my daughter's death. Therefore I do not believe that they need to be defended. If I believed they had anything to do with Rachel's murder I would be their strongest opponent

I am here today to declare that Columbine was not just a tragedy -- it was a spiritual event that should be forcing us to look at where the real blame lies! Much of the blame lies here in this room. Much of the blame lies behind the pointing fingers of the accusers themselves. I wrote a poem just four nights ago that expresses my feelings best.

Your laws ignore our deepest needs,
Your words are empty air.
You've stripped away our heritage,
You've outlawed simple prayer.
Now gunshots fill our classrooms,
And precious children die.
You seek for answers everywhere,
And ask the question "Why?"
You regulate restrictive laws,
Through legislative creed.
And yet you fail to understand,
That God is what we need!

"Men and women are three-part beings. We all consist of body, mind, and spirit. When we refuse to acknowledge a third part of our make-up, we create a void that allows evil, prejudice, and hatred to rush in and wreak havoc. Spiritual presences were present within our educational systems for most of our nation's history. Many of our major colleges began as theological seminaries. This is a historical fact. What has happened to us as a nation? We have refused to honor God, and in so doing, we open the doors to hatred and violence. And when something as terrible as Columbine's tragedy occurs -- politicians immediately look for a scapegoat such as the NRA. They immediately seek to pass more restrictive laws that contribute to erode away our personal and private liberties. We do not need more restrictive laws. Eric and Dylan would not have been stopped by metal detectors. No amount of gun laws can stop someone who spends months planning this type of massacre. The real villain lies within our own hearts.

"As my son Craig lay under that table in the school library and saw his two friends murdered before his very eyes, he did not hesitate to pray in school. I defy any law or politician to deny him that right! I challenge every young person in America , and around the world, to realize that on April 20, 1999, at Columbine High School prayer was brought back to our schools. Do not let the many prayers offered by those students be in vain. Dare to move into the new millennium with a sacred disregard for legislation that violates your God-given right to communicate with Him. To those of you who would point your finger at the NRA -- I give to you a sincere challenge.. Dare to examine your own heart before casting the first stone!
My daughter's death will not be in vain! The young people of this country will not allow that to happen!"
- Darrell Scott

Change #5

If you are my Friend, I care about you.

But you don't have the right to expect this to be a one way Friendship.

If you need a ride, I will give you one. If you can't afford to pay me for gas, a gallon of milk will do.

(This is an example. Meaning that I expect you to contribute in the way you can. I can help with A, you can help with B. We put them together for a mutual beneficial relationship.)

Change #4

My Focus on finances and extras: Tithing FIRST; MANDATORY bills like rent next; saving for a rainy day, and building up a stock of food, essentials, and means of protecting Our Family 3rd.

Fun, jewelry, etc are after ALL of that is taken care of.

Change #3

My focus is on the 7 of us FIRST. My Children, and Husband come first. I will not give "Friends" considerations that they don't get.

My focus is on Our Extended Family Next.

And Then Our Friends.

THEN strangers.

Change #2

ALL of My Family and Friends will be reminded of my Open Door Policy. I am always here if they (you) need me.

But you (they) know how to contact me.

I'm done inviting.

I'm done pushing to be there.

If you (they) invite, I will come. If they (you) want to be a part of our festivities, they (you) are always welcome.

Change #1

My first Resolution... that I'm not waiting until New Year's for:

I will not be buying "Luxuries" until those in my immediate circle have what they need.

If My Mom is in need of new clothes, they come before my movies and play time.

No Success can Compensate for Failure in the Home

My Cousin posted a status about how semi automatic weapons should not be allowed in the general public's hands.

I agree.

My Aunt commented "Did you see what happened in China, yesterday, as well? They have banned guns but are now using knives and box cutters. We need to get back to serving and caring for our neighbors. Home teaching and visiting teaching, in my opinion, is a beginning and can do much to help families who are in need."

And I say "Too much responsibility has been taken from the Family."

Society is expected to carry the slack for what the family fails to do. And society (yes, sometimes the family too) pays when the individual "breaks".

While visiting teaching, and caring for our neighbors is good advice, the care of the individual rests with the immediate and extended family. Not everyone in the world has visiting teachers, but most have some family.

Which brings me to the 2nd topic on my Blogging mind. Homeschooling, or Un Schooling as what Home Schooling with out a curriculum is now called, is what I have come to believe is the divinely inspired choice for Our Family.

And I believe that more and more people are going to turn to it. I don't believe in living in fear. But I do believe in being proactive about My Family's safety. And I also believe that in this changing for the worse world we live in currently, that keeping My Children home with me is the right choice.

My short comings as a parent need to be worked through. Not pawned off on society.

Society is so busy trying to compensate for and control the environment that Parents, Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles need to step us and be in charge of.

And it's just not Society, or the Governments job... or right!

If we as Parents, Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles fail in our God given right and responsibility to raise upstanding adults, then what can we expect?

Are you a Sheep or a Shepherd?

I went with Abby and My In Laws to The Forgotten Carols on Abby's Birthday.

And I'm glad we could be there with them, but sitting separately.

The need for The Spirit to be there in the intimate way it was with just Abby and Me.

And I realized that all of these people sit together in an auditorium and sing, and cry. And then they leave. And once they are out those doors, it's over.

They are sheep. They come to be fed. They feel The Spirit. They feel a connection. And then, they go back to what they were doing before.

They do not take on the role of Shepherd. They might not go out and be unkind. But their connection to their Brothers and Sisters is replaced with the busy routine of their lives.

And I remember General Conference in October where we were reminded of The Lord coming to Peter and asking "Do you love me?" When the answer was "Of course, I love thee." The Lord responded with "Then Feed My Sheep."

We are all Children. Even those of us who are Parents.

And though we are all Sheep, we need to eventually become Shepherds as well.

We need to leave being fed, and then go and feed others.

I am FULL!

I am overflowing with so much this Holiday Season. Some good, some bad, some in between.

I am angry, I am grateful, I am sad, I am awestruck....I WAS afraid. I AM hopeful.

I L O V E my life and My Little Family.

I think I am seeing clearer than in the past. And now I need to make my mouth be quiet till I sort out if I'm actually supposed to SHARE what I see.

I WILL say that Christmas is going to be a turning point. I swear it is.

I am not spending ONE penny that I don't have a SUPERIORLY good reason to.

This is hard, as I have looked around, and Jacob and Elizabeth DEFINITELY need some new clothes. And all of My Kids need at least one pair of new shoes.

But I'm going to pay my tithing FIRST. And then my major bills. And see what that does.

And starting Christmas, I am expecting more of certain people, including myself. And not including as many people in as many things.

Safe Harbors

There are refugees among us
That are not from foreign shores;
And the battles they are waging
Are from very private wars.
And there are no correspondents
Documenting all their grief,
But these refugees among us all
Are yearning for relief.

There are refugees among us.
They don't carry flags or signs.
They are standing right beside us
In the market check out lines;
And the war they've been fighting
It will not be televised,
But the story of their need for love
Is written in their eyes.

This is a call to arms,
To reach out and to hold
The evacuees from the dark.
This is a call to arms,
To lead anguished souls
To safe harbors of the heart.

Can you see through their disguises?
Can you hear what words won't tell?
Some are losing faith in Heaven
'Cause their life's a living Hell.
Is there anyone to help those
Who have no where else to flee?
For the only arms protecting them
belong to you and me.

This is a call to arms,
To reach out and to hold
The evacuees from the dark.
This is a call to arms,
To lead anguished souls
To safe harbors of the heart.
Can you feel the pleas of the refugees
For safe harbors of the heart?

This is a call to arms,
To reach out and to hold
The evacuees from the dark.
This is a call to arms,
To lead anguished souls
To safe harbors of the heart.
Can you feel the pleas of the refugees
For safe harbors of the heart?

Election 2012 comes to an end

In our home, we have used the election as a chance for educating Our Children. We (I can't speak for David, but considering what he has said in the past, I can guess he agrees) are a "We'd like a new President" household. So, we have included this in our prayers as a Family. We would really like the election to end with a change of habitation in the White House.

However, I have also discussed with the Children that if Obama wins, that doesn't mean their prayers weren't heard. It just means God has a different plan in mind, and that's OK.

So, now we wait :-)

The right to vote

OMG! I just read an article that said that in Philadelphia and Ohio the Black Panthers (an anti white group similar in nature to the KKK) has turned out to intimidate voters.

And then, the update said that there are Navy Seals who may turn out to battle these bullies.

And I am in tears!!!!

Because My heart is soooo full knowing that our Military is so GOOD! So Brave. So determined to see right prevail.

No matter WHO they vote for, these Americans have the God Given Right to go into these places and vote for who they want to lead them. Un assaulted.

God BLESS those who will stop at NOTHING to protect our freedoms.

God Grant us a President who will care as much as they do.

Children will Listen!

Elizabeth asked if Glee was on tonight. I said no. It won't be on again until after the Election. She was openly exasperated over that. She stated something along the lines of how stupid it is that we have to miss our shows for this election.

I explained that the election is important. It decides who the next President of our country will be and in turn decides so many things about our future.

I then explained that I feel this election is important enough that I am fasting this Sunday... since it is Fast Sunday. And asking people I know to join me in my fast.

She has asked to join the fast on Sunday.

I agreed that she could. I told her younger sisters that I will not allow THEM to. They are too young.

I don't mean this is any way prideful. However, can you imagine the miracles that could possibly come as David, Myself and our SWEET 9 year old join together to fast for something important to us?

David and I together, ok. Great.

But you add that SWEET, Innocent Baby of Mine!

Angels will be attending to her sweet prayers.

I could NOT be more "Proud" of her right now. And I feel like I've actually made a positive step in her life :-)

What more could a Mother ask for?!

Under/Over... So Limited!

♫ I'm limited
Just look at me--I'm limited
And just look at you--♪


I don't think people see me. If they do,they are constantly putting labels on my forehead that don't come from getting to know me at all.

They either think that because I have 5 kids I'm incapable of anything else, or they expect me to be able to conquer MY world AND theirs.

Why can't I just be the one to set my limits?

If I offer to do something, it's because I feel like I can handle it. If you tell me all of the reasons why with my circumstances being what they are, I can't accomplish what I'm offering to do for you, then it just makes me feel like "Oh, yeah. Maybe I CAN'T do as much as I think I can, so why try. Why stretch my wings. I just need to stay with what's comfortable."

♪ I'm through accepting limits
'Cuz someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know!
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost! ♫

People who limit me or demand way too much aren't people worth having in my Support Circle!

The people worth having are the ones who take the time to know me. Let me stretch my wings, but understand when they need to rest.

HOW much does our Freedom mean to ME?!

I am a Veteran. A Veteran is someone, who at one point in their life, wrote a blank check payable to the United States of America (AND it's people) for an amount up to, and including, their life.

Just how much do you think I care about My Country and those who live here?

I think it's safe to say, I walk the walk. :-)

May God keep our freedoms in tact and watch over us always.

Oh say, Who can see?

Oh, say can you see by the dawn's early light
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars thru the perilous fight,
O'er the ramparts we watched were so gallantly streaming?
And the rocket's red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.
Oh, say does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

On the shore, dimly seen through the mists of the deep,
Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
In full glory reflected now shines in the stream:
'Tis the star-spangled banner! Oh long may it wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion,
A home and a country should leave us no more!
Their blood has washed out their foul footsteps' pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave:
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

Oh! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand
Between their loved home and the war's desolation!
Blest with victory and peace, may the heav'n rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation.
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust."
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

Fast Sunday Nov 4th

I won't tell you how to vote this election. I WILL however, remind you that if you believe in fasting and prayer for things that are critical in your life, and this election is that important to you, Fast Sunday is just DAYS before this, what I would deem, VERY Important Election.

So, Let's fast for the health and security of our country.

You don't need to fast for a specific candidate. This doesn't need to be political at ALL really.

Just knowing that the future of our Nation is on the table no matter WHICH way things go, we can fast that God's hand be in what EVER the outcome it is, and that He will watch over and protect our SACRED land.

That He will keep us free, and safe from oppression.

This is not a call to Vote. (Do that too ;-)

But a call to Ask.... no, PLEAD for Our Country's well being.

No One is Alone

♫ Mother cannot guide you
Now you're on your own
Only me beside you
Still, you're not alone
No one is alone, truly
No one is alone ♪

♪ Sometimes people leave you
Halfway through the wood
Others may decieve you
You decide what's good
You decide alone
But no one is alone ♫

♫ Mother isn't here now

Wrong things, right things

Who knows what she'd say?

Who can say what's true?

Nothing's quite so clear now

Do things, fight things

Feel you've lost your way?

You decide, but

You are not alone

Believe me,
No one is alone


Truly ♪

♪ You move just a finger
Say the slightest word
Something's bound to linger
Be heard ♫

♫ No one acts alone

Careful

No one is alone

People make mistakes

Fathers

Mothers

People make mistakes
Holding to their own
Thinking they're alone ♪

♪ Honor their mistakes

Fight for their mistakes

Everybody makes

One another's terrible mistakes
Witches can be right
Giants can be good
You decide what's right
You decide what's good ♫

♫ Just remember

Someone is on your side

Someone else is not
While we're seeing our side

Maybe we forgot
They are not alone
No one is alone♪

♪ Hard to see the light now

Just don't let it go

Things will come out right now
We can make it so
Someone is on your side
No one is alone ♫

Starting Now

I've heard 2 things this week that have really impacted my thought process:

1)A Friend of mine was talking to someone and admitted to "merely surviving" for the past 11 years. And also "running" from her past. This person said to her, "You have been actively procrastinating."

2)Status Shuffle: "We use our fear as an excuse, when really, fear should be our motivation."


Starting today, I will no longer be an Active Procrastinator.

Starting today, I will use fear as my motivation. Not my excuse.

Also, today I "signed" an online pledge to not text and drive. Please join me and keep our roads safe(r) ;-)

*******************************************************

And now, a statement I just read as I typed this post:

You could NEVER walk a mile in my shoes... WHY? Because my shoes are AWESOME and I don't loan them out!


AWESOME! I'm adopting that!

One More Time

I have a Proposition for you.

That one, I get!!!

I think it's obnoxiously hilarious when people who know I've been divorced; that David doesn't even live in the same state as I do.... just visits every 2 weeks; that we had a rough marriage before..... which left me on my own A LOT during the first 6 years of our marriage; OH, AND that he was deployed with the Military from the time I was 8 months pregnant with Elizabeth until right before Elysia was born; Think that I know NOTHING about being a Single Parent. NOPE! I get that one!

I have been a Single Parent of anywhere from 1 to 5 Children throughout the 10 years since I got married the first time.

I think people get caught up on the fact that A) Our divorce was only 3 months, and B) David is still in the picture.

What they don't see/understand is:

Although we were only DIVORCED for 3 months, we were officially separated for 3 months BEFORE that. And that was the SECOND time we had officially separated. I had kicked David out, or left him MANY times before that. So, I had at LEAST a year and a half of "official" Single Parent time under my belt.

And it doesn't matter that David is still "in the picture" and paying the bills. He is 100% NOT AROUND most of the time. I don't HAVE a second parent to help out. It's JUST ME!

SO, labels may need to be adjusted (No surprise THERE! People are ALWAYS trying to put strict labels on things that they don't always fit) But I am DEFINITELY no stranger to being a Single Parent!

"Instead of worrying about what people might think, why not spend time trying to accomplish something for which people will admire you." - Dale Carnegie

Wife Swap

I LOVE the show "Wife Swap"!!! Sorry, ya'll. You MIGHT be SHOCKED, but watching that show has shown me that I'm a REALLY balanced, "normal", Caring Mom!


I really am SMACK in the middle of EVERY extreme I have seen on that show.

I am structured. But I know how to, and teach my kids how to let loose.

I expect certain things from My Family. But they also get time to do things THEIR way.... as long as they are respectuful and have manners.

I teach values, respect, love, caring, responsibility, taking care of belongings including our bodies.

I teach moderation. And there are only TWO things I have taught my children you DO NOT EVER try: Tobacco, and Drugs. WE take medicine AS Prescribed. ANd I explain that to them.

We have Family discussions about sex. And My Girls know that I didn't take the advice I'm giving them, and regret it. But that it's their life. And if they CHOOSE to have sex before they are adults, and married, there could be consequences that they won't like. I teach them about SAFE sex. Not NO sex.

I am willing to hear that I am not the best Mom.

I am willing to look at myself through a magnifying glass, and view the truth. And then change it, if I need to!


Example: Today, I said to Elizabeth, who was being unkind to her sibling, "Why are you being mean?" She said "Because sometimes YOU are mean to us." I said "I am sorry for that. Do you see me doing better?" SHe said that she did. I explained that I will work harder. But that does not make it ok for her to do it to others.

I think that is something many parents fail at. Being real, honest, and allowing their Children to critique them and change when what they are doing isn't right.

I teach them to be healthy. To mange their time, money and desires. I teach them that if they want something, they have to earn it.

A Trip to The Temple = Buyers Remorse!

"And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed) Kid, you'll move mountains.” -- Dr. Seuss

I went to a Slumber Party last night. And I spent WAY more than I planned to.

Then I went to The Temple today.

And now I have Buyers Remorse.

And it has NOTHING to do with the items I was buying. It's that I struggle to pay what I need to, when it stops me from buying what I want.

And if it's between tithing and fun... Well, being 100% honest, I can find a MILLION ways to justify the fun.

"I'll pay tithing with the next check."

But I have decided that I don't want to wait 2 more weeks for the blessings I have been taught come with paying tithing. I need them now.

SO, since I am DETERMINED to succeed at doing things "right", I am going to suck it up, and cut back my SP purchase by 2/3rds.

SOME of my justifications are really valid. Everything I am getting (after I cut back) is on "special". And a couple of the items will be Christmas presents.

But I REALLY don't need to spend an extra $100 on "That would be nice" items. ESPECIALLY when it comes out of my tithing.

*Just to make sure I am clear: My stand on the items Slumber Parties and other related businesses sell, is that they are not for EVERYONE... But if you like them, they can be very enhancing to your personal life, and your romantic life. Therefore, I like to budget to pamper myself, and the One I Love, with some of their products.*

So, I am ending this with a new resolve to succeed at making things right.

Temples

$50 Lesson

Noise...

I have certain "Talents". One of them is the ability to hear "things" rather than see or feel them. It's sometimes referred to as being Clair-audience. Clair-audience means ‘clear-hearing’. It is the ability to ‘hear’ Spirit. Actually, that USED to be a Talent of mine. It's one I struggle with lately. Mainly because noise is EVERYWHERE. I it makes it hard to "Hear."

These days I am more Clair-voyant than Clair-audience. You know how they say that when you loose one sense, a different sense usually becomes heightened. Well... Too much noise all around. I DO have the ability to see things as they really are a LOT of the time.

But if you ever happen to notice that excess noise drives me nuts, this is why.

It's All Coming Back to Me....

Almost 2 years ago, , and the few following it, started what I have referred to as The Blog War. It was explosive! It left me less a few "Friends". Thank GOD for trials! Thank GOD that things like that happen and if we use them right, make us better, stronger, and get us to places that are so much better than what we imagined then.

I look forward to the day I meet My Lord. I know that a sense of release will over take me. I know I will fall into His arms and sob! I know I will know infinite Joy at that moment. I just need to remember that daily when little temptations come my way.... in that moment, I want to be free of shame and regret. I make a commitment anew to repent and live a purer life!

********************************************************

Anyway, the reason for this post is NOT that. Although I find it to be important as a Preface.


My reason for this post is that I have been fortunate to have a 2nd chance at one of those lost Friendships. And I am grateful.

And it made me reflect to this time almost 2 years ago.

And I realized that when Heidi posted her Blog post titled "I Would Do Anything For Love" (she has deleted that section of posts... Very mature of her but still they are gone, so I am NOT 100% SURE that was exactly the title of that post, but I'm sure it had to have been to have gotten me on this particular tirade.), It crossed a line with me. And after reading MY posts, I actually have already said that it got under my skin because it brings back the very first TRULY traumatic time I can recall in my life.

Her post brought back a time frame where I lost My Grandmother, My First Baby, My First Love. It's not that I was a "Hater" by any means. But that I felt that my trauma was someone else's playground.

I don't think she did it on purpose. I do think her following actions were AMAZINGLY insensitive and malicious... especially for someone who has felt that kind of pain. However, I am not posting this to open old wounds. Or to talk about what kind of person she is.

I am posting this because I am revisiting the time almost 2 years ago when my life changed. And looking into integrating people from that time frame back into my life means joining the past with the present.

And as I reflected, I realized that a line was crossed in my head and emotions when that particular song was mentioned. Not because I own it. But because she was in MY PLACE at HIS SIDE, using MY SONG!

It was the fact that I was watching a my life 11 years ago happen all over again. A time when I experienced more pain than up to that point, I had ever experienced in my LIFE. But I was the audience, while my Nemesis was ME! With OUT the pain. With OUT the trauma. What was a HORRIBLE time for me, was a WONDERFUL time for her!

I can write and write and write to try to explain. I just hope anyone reading this gets what I'm trying to say because more words will just make it a rambling mess.

This is all about coming to terms with WHY something SO innocent caused such insanity!

****************************************************
Just a ♪ to end on, I DO think it was very mature of her to remove that section of posts. I however, will not be taking the gory parts out of my post list because it's a part of my history. And I want it to stay. It would be like removing my arm because it doesn't fit the mold of who I want to be like it used to. Clear as Mud?

Things I've changed, things you should try

Two days ago, we dropped cow's milk like a HOT POTATO. Cold Turkey. GONE!!!!

Instead, we buy Almond, Rice, and Coconut Milk.

Fluoride toothpaste is also on it's way OUT. Which kind of sucks because like shampoo, I have a stock of toothpaste (I like to be prepared ;)

We have started using OnGuard toothpaste(DoTerra). It contains the OnGuard Essential Oil Blend which has a fresh cinnamon smell (cause it contains cinnamon among other things,) is antimicrobial, ingest-able, and does amazing things for your immune system. I use it in laundry, on dishes, as a mouthwash, to mop the floor.... LOVE IT!

Also, I have started having a glass of 2 tblspoons Apple Cider Vinegar, 6 Oz of Almond Milk, and a tblspoon of Honey a couple of times a day. It is weirdly not bad. And Apple Cider Vinegar is supposed to be AMAZING for you!

I need to get some Red Raspberry capsules. It is ALSO good for your body in so many ways!

Become an Egg Donor | RSC Bay Area

I'm actually kind of sad.  I'm too old to do this, which I think is REDICULOUS.  I'm a Healthy 33 yr old who has a stock of them that I don't need and am HAPPY to give to a couple who needs them! Become an Egg Donor | RSC Bay Area

I keep yelling about My Position, now it's time to SHOW!

They say that it's "Better to keep your mouth shut, and be thought a Fool. Than it is to Open it and PROVE yourself a Fool."

OK.

I HAVE tried over the years to abide by this. But I hated everyone assuming I'm a Fool. So I've yelled and yelled My Position on EVERYTHING! And NO ONE seems to know my position. Or that I'm NOT an Uneducated Fool.

*However, I AM please to announce that it seems to be starting to be proven as time passes the Fruits of My Labors. How decisions I made years ago, and have stood by despite EVERYONE telling me I was wrong, are starting to be viewed as "Maybe she DID know what she was doing AFTER ALL!"*

SO.

Here is My Declaration. These are things I stand FIRMLY on and will stand by. Here is My Position.

1)I Home School. I don't know if there will EVER be a time when that will change. I doubt it. I KNOW that what I am choosing by choosing to keep My Children out of Public School is THE BEST ANSWER. I PRAY My Children won't resent me for it. I have them in Dance, Soccer, and Music with Me. We go ALL OVER THE PLACE and they learn a LOT! Holly said to me "I hope YOU don't resent you for it." And THAT was a Moment of Truth. Where I realized that I WOULD resent myself if I caved, and against my KNOWING that I shouldn't, put them in Public School anyway.


2)I believe in MODERATION. In ALL things. Not abstaining. Not over indulging. EXCEPT when it comes to illegal drugs and tobacco. In reference to THOSE, I believe in ABSOLUTE abstinence.

3)I believe that we have money for what is important to us. And can't find money for the things that aren't. And SOME people have their priorities on this topic SERIOUSLY F*'d up!!!!!!!!!!!

4)I am NOT perfect. I've made LOTS of mistakes. And yes, that is part of why people still wonder where I stand. Because I'm not 100% perfectly consistent. I'm still learning. And I'm ALWAYS working to find that balance of moderation. And I am AMAZINGLY better today than I was a week ago.

5)I believe in CONSTANTLY evolving (If I'm doing this correctly, you should be seeing how all of these are flowing together. One statement flows off of and is an extension 0f the last)

6)EMPATHY is something I cannot preach ENOUGH about. I believe THE WORST CRIME you can commit against another Human Being is cutting them down rather than taking the time to understand where they are coming from, where they are trying, and where they are struggling. As long as they are still making an EFFORT, I will give them the benefit of the doubt. HOWEVER, Once someone PROVES their motives are nothing but malice, I cut my empathy off and cauterize it! I do Forgive easily as part of having Empathy. I accept "I'm Sorry" pretty readily and will ALWAYS offer a 2nd chance.

7)I will NOT be abused. Nor will I allow My Family to be abused... by ANYONE. Including myself and each other.

8)I stand 100% by MY RIGHT and ability to be free from the meddling of others. To be in a Traditional Partnership with My Husband that has sole authority over Our Family with God's guidance. I have a conscience. I have common sense. I reserve the right to teach, discipline and protect My Family and assets according to our beliefs of what is or is NOT acceptable.

9) I believe in NOT being a Lemming. PERIOD. Thinking outside the box is EXPECTED!

I have an ENORMOUS capacity for understanding and love.

I am VERY intelligent.

And NOTHING is just chance.... I am a planner, a plotter, and a schemer. You can be assured that EVERY decision I make takes the 9 points above into EXTREME consideration.

It's HIS plan!

I just read a previous post of mine.

It's SO COOL to see that Bella came just 1 week after Summer 2011 officially ended! I'd call that pretty precise wishing and achieving!

Now, I don't know which job I was referring to, but I can guess. However, things worked out even better in that area than I'd hoped. David did INDEED get an AWESOME job by the end of 2010 (the post was May of 2010). And the job is proving to be EVERYTHING we need!

We didn't get the house. BUT we are now in a place where we are Blooming BEAUTIFULLY as a Family.

Thank GOD for being in charge, and taking my rudimentary plan and making it perfect.

Laurie

Jamie suggested that I use names so that people know for CERTAIN whether to be offended because I AM talking to them... or NOT.

So Laurie, if you still read these posts, this one IS about you.

One thing that you said SEVERAL times was that "Actions speak louder than words." Well, you didn't pay much attention to my actions. OR my words,for that matter.

If you did, you would have actually caught all of the things I DID for you.

I bought you a membership to the aquarium.

I got you into the zoo SEVERAL times.

I Offered to CONTINUE getting you into the zoo so you didn't HAVE to spend any of your "limited" (according to you) $ on a membership.

I saved you $ on Mickelli's Birthday Party by a) buying your membership to the aquarium, and b) splitting the cost with you by combining Elizabeth's party with hers.

I am the one who sought you out after being "dismissed" by you SEVERAL times for WHO KNOWS WHAT!

I came to help you with your primary lesson.

I invited you over week after week and cooked for you.

I helped you decorate.

I picked you up and drove you... AND your kids.... EVERYWHERE we went together.

And through it all, you always acted like my "things" weren't good enough for you and your Family.

If I offered your children... your VERY SPOILED Children at that...a bottle of juice, it was ALWAYS turned down. Snacks, the same.

And THEN, YOU have the NERVE to accuse ME of not being a "True Friend." ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!?

I invited you over, and over, and over, and over, AND OVER to things. And you LIED TO ME. Over, and over, and over! I even invited you to an ALL paid for movie with snacks. And offered to come pick you up. And you LIED TO ME about why you didn't want to.

And THEN you got offended over things you read of mine...INSISTING I was slandering you. And attacking ME, when the things you read had NOTHING to do with you.

BUT by getting offended and taking them personally, maybe they fit you, and I just didn't know it.

SO. If actions speak louder than words... Well, where YOU are concerned, BOTH your actions AND your words have been pretty disrespectful towards ME and MY FAMILY. And have shown how LOUSY of a Friend, and quite frankly, a pretty crappy person you are.

I however, think I have proven that I WAS a true Friend to you.

And the icing on the cake, that I will NEVER forget is the time you looked at me at the mall, and said " You owe me $! Do you want to buy that for me?" And All there was for me to do, was look at you and say "Um,no! I don't owe you $" Because I made sure to never be in arrears with you!

We're back online :-)

YAY! Thanks to My WONDERFUL Husband, I can type in paragraphs again!

So, here we go ;-)

Somethings are predictable.... like Death and Taxes. Oh and people WILL talk

One of my recent Blog posts lost me another "Friend." SURPRISE! Um, NOT!!!! My Blog posts always seem to have that affect. STUPID, it is! People just take themselves way too seriously. And they get permanently offended by temporary issues. Surprisingly enough, the post had nothing to do with them, but they insist it did! And they have with held permission for me to talk or blog about them. Sorry Honey, I can say whatever I choose. That's the thing. This isn't the first person over the weekend (which I've spent VERY sick, BTW) that has suggested I don't share what I know about them. But BOTH of these people are major Gossip Spreaders. And beacause of them PLUS one other incident early in the weekend, I realized something. PEOPLE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT YOU. It doesn't matter who you are. It doesn't matter what you do. It may be good. It may be bad. But they are GOING to talk. The thing to do about it, instead of getting your panties in a bunch, is to give them as much positive to say as possible. I had someone say once about me that "She may be crazy, but I get her crazy (I get the reasons behind her "crazy")." And you know, that's about all I ever ask. You may not agree with how I am. You may not like or agree with how I do things. But if you can at least see the logic, or reasons and understand THAT, I'll take it as at LEAST neutral. If the only thing you have to say about me is neutral, then I'm doing alright ;-) And if you are able to share good things about me. Even better. The ONLY control one has over what people say about them, is how much ammunition they willingly provide against themselves. If you want to control what people say about you, limit what you share. Let them make stuff up when they're bored. BS dies quickly when they run out of things to make up about you. You want to limit your enemies if you don't want negative things being said. And freaking out insisting that people don't talk about you, only creates them. Your Friends are GOING to talk about you. Hopefully all positive, and never private matters, BUT they WILL talk. Your Family are GOING to talk about you. Again, HOPEFULLY all positive, and never private matters. BUT THEY WILL TALK. Your enemies ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT YOU! So try to neutralize what they have to say. Make sure you're a person of intergrity, so that the worst they can say is "I don't like them, but that's about it." But they WILL talk. So MOVE ON!!!! Surround yourself with people you can trust. But DON'T freak out when you suspect you were the topic of conversation. If someone DOES blog about you. See it as being interesting enough that you left a lasting impression. But if you go FLYING OFF THE HANDLE when you ASSUME a post is about you, you just might make a new enemy.

YES! It makes sense!!!

I was talking with a couple of AMAZING Girl Friends tonight. And something one of them said was very interesting in respect to the way the Priesthood is "run" in our church. And I realized something. Let me back up to another topic that comes full circle: We were talking about jerky ex-husbands. And how they tend to try to persuade other people to see them as the Victim, or Good Guy in a divorce. And how damaging it can be to the other party in the relationship. And it brings me back to one of my favorite subjects.... Karma. Things evening out in the end, and such. People in general aren't as blind to the difference between a "Good" person, and a "Bad" person as we might think, or they may appear. Most people react to them differently out of intution. And when you have a yucky person trying to pretend to be not yucky, I am really learning that most people catch on. And then it goes into the church. A person gets into serious trouble and faces disciplinary action with the church because of a choice they made. And when they try to reconcile with the church, sometimes, it doesn't go so smoothly. IE they may go into their respective clergy and ask to be reinstated into full fellowship, and be told "Not yet." And it may not always be obvious why they are being denied. But very often there is a reason.... as in, someone in the line of Heiarchy that makes has a hand in the decision whether or not to allow the reconciliation, doesn't feel quite right about it. And denies the request. And maybe, just maybe, it's because they see something in the person, or situation that just doesn't quite click as valid enough to allow them to be fully involved yet. And I like how it just makes sense on a level where it turns into and "Ah Hah" moment.

Unwilling

I truly believe that Heavenly Father views not being grateful and being unwilling to be kind/help others as the WORST things you can be next to murder and adultery. Boy, being a Parent has taught me a TON about Him. I view a lack of gratitude and kindness, and abuse of any kind between my children as ABHORANT. So His view on those things is easy to understand. I have encountered several cases of these first 2 mentioned "crimes" lately, and it really gets under my skin. Remember the scripture "Blessed are the Merciful, for they shall obtain Mercy."? Yup! Pretty much. What you refuse to others, be it Mercy, Forgiveness, etc. Will be likely refused to you when the time of reckoning comes.

Happy Father's Day

Sorry for my presentational errors.... oh wait, they're NOT mine!

I am realatively frustrated with Blogger. If anyone can help me with this, I'd love it. It doesn't matter how often I hit "Enter" to separate sentences, paragraphs, etc., when the post is published, everything just runs together. When I am typing, my presentation is WAY more sophisticated. Sorry for the Ignorance it presents. I'm really NOT that bad at it.

Free Lunch Summer Program in Granite District (Utah)

FREE meals available for all children 18 and younger when school is out. No application or registration required. Information(800) 453-FOOD or Visit www.uah.org and click the Summer Food image on the left to view a searchable map of summer food sites in Utah. *Catherine C. Hoskins Head Start 6447 W 4100 S, West Valley City Supper, 5:00pm-6:30pm M-F Open June 4 to August 17 *Centennial Park 5405 W 3100 S, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Centennial Park 5405 W 3100 S, West Valley City Supper, 4:00pm-5:30pm M-Th Open June 4 to August 17 *City Park 4500 W 3500 S, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *David Gourley Park 5015 S 4300 W, Kearns Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Granite Park Junior High 3031 S 200 E, Salt Lake City Lunch, 11:00am-12:00pm M-Th Open June 6 to July 12 *Harmony Park 3700 S Main St, Salt Lake City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Hillsdale Park 3275 S 3200 W, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Hunter Park 3600 S 6000 W, West Valley City Lunch, 11:15am-12:45pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Kearns Oquirrh Park 5670 S 4800 W, Kearns Lunch, 11:00am-1:00pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Kings Point Park 1330 W Rothchild Dr, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Magna Fitness Center 3270 S 8400 W, Magna Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Magna Head Start 8575 W 3500 S, Magna Supper, 5:00pm-6:30pm M-F Open June 4 to August 17 *Magna Park 8900 W 2600 S, Magna Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Monroe Elementary 4450 W 3100 S, West Valley City Lunch, 12:00pm-12:30pm M-Th Open June 11 to June 28 *Parkway Park 3405 W Parkway Blvd, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Peachwood Park 3510 W 3965 S, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Pioneer Elementary 3860 S 3380 W, West Valley City Lunch, 12:30pm-1:00pm M-Th Open June 11 to June 28 *Redwood Elementary 2650 S Redwood Rd, West Valley City Lunch, 12:00pm-1:00pm M-Th Open June 11 to June 29 *Redwood Multipurpose Center 3060 S Redwood Rd, West Valley City Lunch, 12:00pm-1:00pm M-F Open June 11 to August 17 *Robert Fitts Park 3050 S 500 E, Salt Lake City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Rolling Meadows Elementary 2950 Whitehall Dr, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 11 to June 28 *Roosevelt Elementary 3225 S 800 E, Salt Lake City Lunch, 12:30pm-1:00pm M-F Open June 11 to June 29 *Southridge Park 5051 S 4015 W, Kearns Lunch, 11:30am-1:00pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Taylorsville Millrace Park 1150 W 5400 S, Taylorsville Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Taylorsville Park 4721 S Redwood Road, Taylorsville Lunch, 11:30am-1:00pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Vista Park 4950 S 1950 W, Taylorsville Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *West Kearns Elementary 4900 S 4620 W, Kearns Lunch, 11:45am-12:30pm M-Th Open June 11 to June 28 *West View Park 4100 S 6000 W, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17 *Western Hills Elementary 5190 S Heath Ave, Kearns Lunch, 11:30am-12:00pm M-F Open June 11 to June 22 *Westlake Junior High 3400 S 3450 W, West Valley City Lunch, 12:15pm-12:45pm M-Th Open June 5 to July 12 *Woodledge Park 5210 W 4310 S, West Valley City Lunch, 11:30am-12:30pm M-F Open June 18 to August 17

Where you do the cleaning, you can make the mess.

Please remove your shoes. Who knew how much that little phrase can mean... or do. I have a sign on my front door. Before you even get into my home that says "Please Remove Shoes." And again, when you walk through the door, before you get past the entry way, is another sign... bigger, and a little "cuter" making that request. That doesn't mean "Please remove your shoes IF you feel like it." Or "Please remove your shoes unless you only walk on the lanoleum." YES, as I have stated before, walking on my carpet with your shoes on is the MAIN concern. It is the MAIN purpose for removing your shoes. It is also the MAIN purpose for these signs. I figure if I post them early enough, then your shoes are off by the time you get to the carpet. HOWEVER. I do not want shoes worn in my home. Period. The End. I will make an allowance for ONE person. My Father in Law. For him, I have purchased disposable booties. I love him. I want him to be able to come into my home. The End. If you come into my home, and walk around my kitchen or dining room with your shoes on, it means I have to mop the floor in order to keep my home in the condition I want it. I get that having people in a home creates messes. It means things regularly need to be cleaned. I am a very logical person. I get this. I get that a home is meant to be lived in. HOWEVER, cleaning the floors is a chore I have decided to minimize. And ask any who come into my home to cooporate. To make for a more pleasant environment all around. I LOVE people. I LOVE to socialize. I want the healthy atmosphere that comes with having people in my life and home. But it's NOT contradictive to ask that people remove their shoes. And for some reason, that seems to be exactly what people make it. And it's made into such a big thing that it doesn't need to be. These days, it is NOT unusual to be asked to leave your shoes outside when you enter someone's home. Our Home is our Temple. Our place of safety. Our place of worship. Even the General Authorities have pointed out the sacredness of the Home. And when we go to the Temple, we leave the world outside. To add to the sacred and peaceful atmosphere. And when we are asked at the Temple to leave our shoes and change our clothes, I have never heard of a complaint. People acknowledge that it is part of the requirement to be there. It is "private property" and people respect that in order to be there, there are rules that are to be followed. I think as Mortals, we forget that we are just as entitled to the respect given to Diety as God is. But isn't that what Jesus' ministry was all about. Teaching us our divine heritage, and to treat ourselves and others as Kings and Queens in the making. SERIOUSLY! If you looked at a person and really grasped that they are a Prince or Princess and the child of the God of Heaven and Earth, how would you treat them? Would you be as respectful in their "Temple" as Their Father's? My Temple may be WAY more humble than any OFFICIAL Temple. But you can't get much more humble than a stable. And The Redeemer of the World was born in one. It was just as much a Temple as King Solomon's the second He entered it and called it home. SO, I feel that I have every right to set a standard to establish respect and reverence. I am not perfect. There should be other regulations in place. And I work on those. But you have to start somewhere. And with that purpose in mind. I do not allow shoes in my home. Now, we have a large amount of space that is lanoleum before you get to the carpet. And this makes it significantly easier to take shoes off, and sometimes allows for shoes to be left on when running children or groceries in to the home without affecting the carpets cleanliness. But that does not mean the request is conditional. With that, let me point out that the point of removing shoes is to keep the grime that exists in the parking lot, on the side walk, on the indoor/outdoor carpeting outside our door, etc. OUTSIDE. Therefore, if you didn't wear shoes, and wore socks instead, they need to be removed just like shoes do. So taking your shoes off outside my door, or not wearing shoes in an attempt to get on top of things, defeats the purpose. ;-) SO, feel free to make the rules in YOUR home where you set the standard, and do the cleaning. But in my home; where I have been given the charge to set the standard, and do the cleaning ~ You need to remove your shoes... and socks if you wore them outside.

What do I want to be today?

I am so grateful for my life. I know you don't hear that enough from me. You see, the problem is that I am so PASSIONATE that I feel deeply on both sides of the spectrum. So I get frustrated easily. But I also get happy easily. So. Here are the messages I want conveyed: 1)I love you. If you are reading this, I do. I don't need to know you. I love you because you exist. SOMEONE needs this today. If that someone is you, know that you are important. You now have something to live up to. ************************************************************ 2)I LOVE MY CHILDREN. They are KIND. They are SMART. They are IMPORTANT!! (I need to get that on my wall so they see it EVERY day!) They are THE Reason for My Existence and my CONSTANT battle for all that is good and pure! I owe them so very much! There are NO words to truly convey their ABSOLUTE BEAUTY!!!!!! I am so unworthy, yet GRATEFUL beyond imagination, to be Their Mother!!!!! ************************************************************ 3)I LOVE MY HUSBAND. He is AMAZING. He has nurtured me for at LEAST 13 years... I'm sure he's been nurturing me since eternity began! He is, and always will be The Love of My Life. My One and Only. There IS NO ONE but HIM!!!!!! PERIOD. All of those cheezy Love Song lyrics apply to him!!!!! ************************************************************ 4)I LOVE LIFE. Everything about it. I love my mistakes.... for the lessons I have learned. I love the People who have hurt me... for teaching me. I love the People who have loved me.... for nurturing me and giving me wings. I love growth. I love beauty. I just LOVE LIFE! I want to live 1000 years. I need to be better at keeping my weight down, but I love food, and entertainment, and luxury and culture.... so it's hard because YES, I LOVE indulgence. ************************************************************ 5)I LOVE The Being I KNOW and Worship as GOD!!!!!! He is so much more than an unreachable disciplinarian. He is sooooo good to me!!! I KNOW He is My FATHER. I KNOW He is EVERYTHING I want to be as a Parent. And I KNOW he loves me! He does everything I want to do for My Children. He is PERFECT. NOT believing in Him, is NOT an option with what I have been through and learned through my life experiences. ************************************************************ 6)I LOVE Jesus Christ. Cliche? Yep. True? Definitely. I had a conversation today with my neighbor. She pointed out that I can be a bit abrasive with my bluntness. Yep! But I asked her (she was referring to a specific thing I said), "Was there any other way to say it?" My answer to that is "NOPE!" (I do everything in my power when I am about to say something that could have a negative impact.. or any real impact at all, to make sure I review the options for wording and tone before I blurt it out. I know it doesn't always seem that way, And I am NEVER perfect 100% of the time. But I do my DARNDEST to do my best to be sure it's the only way to say it before I just say it ;-) And the same goes for the statement that I Love Jesus Christ. There is no other way to say it. ************************************************************ 7)I Speak the absolute truth 99% of the time. That 1% is based on 2 variables: 1) I don't have 100% of the facts, 2) My Family is endagered by some part of the truth. And I don't mean their feelings could get hurt.... I mean true danger. I learned an important lesson about my pride tonight. And I handled the situation honorably. And it went ok :) It was scary. I had 100% my ego on the line. And I did it! I told the truth. I need to consistently stick by this quote: "Be who you are and say what you mean. Because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind!" ** Dr Seuss (of COURSE ;-) ** "If someone really loves you, they will love you no matter what you say because of who you are . . . a person who they love! Now , you might, on occasion, say things which people who matter to you get upset about. This can be a painful thing to have happen, but it can, and does happen from time to time. Now for a few things to keep in mind. First, you should say what you mean. Being honest is something which has to be a high priority for each of us. However; this doesn't mean you can't be thoughtful and considerate about what you say and how you say it. Colossians 4:6 says, "Your speech should always be gracious and sprinkled with insight so that you may know how to respond to every person.""** ************************************************************ 8)No matter what you may think, my ONE and ONLY goal in this life is to be a genuinely GOOD Person. And to raise My Children to be th at way. I make mistakes. I pick myself up EVERY time. And I do better. :-D Goodnight all.... ~cheezy, but genuine phrase warning~ Blessed Be ♥

If I Bend too far, I Might Break

"Some things I cannot, I will not allow!" Fiddler on the Roof * If you've read my past couple of posts, this is a common theme. I've had it with bending, being walked on, and getting pushed around. "It's not healthy, for me to feel this way."... Alvin and the Chipmunks ;-) * This past week, I have learned more than at any other time about NOT giving up what I want for people who don't matter. There are a couple of Cliche phrases like "If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything." That are running through my head right now. My Neighbor came over tonight with good intentions, and TRULY sent an already hectic evening into hyper drive. And I realized why I am such a HARD ASS!!!!!!!!!! I have ZERO reason to change. What does it do for me? It's not usually appreciated, and I end up feeling like a door mat. It's not worth it. Almost No ONE wants to be emotionally involved or committed enough to the relationship to stick around for the after math. And that's their choice. But then they don't get the right to shake things up. Period. And I wonder if Heavenly Father agrees on a certain level. I wonder if He has been wanting me to get to this point where I will stand my ground and not be movable on ANYTHING. Because My Children need to learn certain lessons as NON Negotiable. And if I bend on some things, what's to stop me from bending on everything. I need to be firm. I need to be un movable. I need to pick a side and stay there. And so, I am. My word is solid. No means no. Sorry. I may lose even more "friends" over this. I may have more heart ache. But I know it will be temporary heart ache. It always hurts worse and longer when it's the pain from compromising your values. Now I just pray that the people who matter will understand. That my children will somehow see that Mommy is so strict because she loves them and needs to be firm and strong, and not swayed. For ANYTHING or ANYONE.

House Rules

Ok, so I am really amazed that I even have to come up with this. But things I thought were basic common sense/basic respect, are appearantly NOT. If it's on the 1st part of the list, I guarantee my word that I will never, nor will I EVER allow my children to do it in your home. I will begin with the ones that are what I deem common sense/courtesy. And end with the ones that are specific to MY HOME, and are not something someone would think of automatically. 1) No jumping on the Furniture. 2) No throwing. 3) Stay out of My Dishwasher. If you need a clean dish, check the cupboards. If it's in the dishwasher, it's either dirty, or it's clean and I want it to stay in there (I often have clean, sanitized baby stuff in there. Please leave it alone.) If what you need isn't in the cupboards, ask. Don't just go searching. Don't just start putting stuff in there. you could very well be mixing dirty dishes with clean dishes, and I don't need the extra work, thanks. 4) If you create/bring the mess, you clean it up/take it with you. 5) Do Not break, smash, or slam toys into walls. I don't CARE if they're just kids. we're not going to SUGGEST they respect our home. We're going to EXPECT it. And the Parents need to do the same. 6) YOU are responsible for your kids. If your child is jumping on the bed, and I have said "Please don't." The next time it happens is YOUR responsibility. If your child wants something to eat or drink, you need to wait on them. I already have 5. ******************************************************* 1) NO SHOES on the carpet. NONE. NADA. NON. Ne. Nej. Nein. Don't come in, remove your shoes, and when it's time to leave, put them on and then walk through my living room. (It's a Really common thing that people do.) I have Booties to go over your shoes, but they are reserved for really select situations. Not just anyone who doesn't want to bother taking their shoes off. 2) The entry way/kitchen in my home is Not a play area. Think about it. Do your kids really play in your entry way? I have observed many homes, and it's NOT a "normal place" for playing. That's where the door opens and closes and people come in and then go on their way. Mine is no different. ( I GET that in some homes, especially older ones, there is no separation of the entry way and living areas. But in newer homes or split level homes, there is a DEFINITE separation, and in MY home, the entry way is not in the main stream area at ALL.) I don't baby proof my kitchen. NOTHING in there is for playing with. Our toys and Children stay in the carpeted areas of our home. Bathrooms are not for playing in either. 3) Your child's potty issues are YOUR responsibility. If they need help, you need to be helping them. I don't want to clean up my OWN Family's bodily fluids/excretions. I CERTAINLY don't want to clean up their's... or YOURS. (see #4 above.) And they (as well as you) need to wash your hands after using the bathroom, cleaning up a bodily fluid/excretion mess, or changing a poopy diaper in my home. I don't care what you do in yours. 4) Don't change a poopy diaper in the middle of my living room unless it's a child under the age of 8 or 9 months. Once they are having "big kid" poops, you are welcome to use the changing table or bathroom. ESPECIALLY when there is a crowd of people in my home. Sorry if any of you think that this post is seriously over board. And "Boy does she have a rigid way of existing." But think about it. This is really all pretty common sense. It's respectful. It makes our time together more enjoyable, and means that when you leave, I'm not thinking that "I don't ever want to do that again!"

Not in MY home you won't!!!!

Alright. The gloves are coming off on THIS pet peeve. Do Not EVER come into my Home and disrespect me. I don't care how close we are. I don't care if you're super duper comfortable with me. If I want to open the cupboards, pull every single dish out, and declare them dirty and fill up the sink with sparkling clean dishes to wash all over again, it is MY choice in MY home. Now, if you want to choose to not associate with me because you find that to be abusive to my Husband and kids, or that just made it so there were no dishes to be used and I invited you over for dinner and now there's no way to eat, FINE. But if you don't want to be my Friend just over the act of putting all my clean dishes in the sink, you're shallow. I am AMAZED at how many people come into my home and criticize me. In My Home!!!! It's like I have a sign on my wall that says "Feel Free to Tell me just how dis satisfied you are with MY way of doing things." The biggest reasons I HATE this trend is A) It's Just Plain Disrespectful and B) I would never DREAMof doing it to someone else. Unless the way you do things in your home reflects poorly on me or affects My Family directly, I will keep my mouth SHUT!!!!! It's NOT my place to criticize you. EVEN if it's bad for YOUR family to live in the environment you provide. If I don't like the environment, I don't have to be in it. Now, I would hope that you might choose to take me aside and have the assertiveness and respect to talk to me if there's a problem. For example: "Candace, I know it's your home, but I don't like to come over because I find some of your rules a bit much." (VS "I don't do THAT!" or "I can't believe you do THAT!" or "Why can't you do that differently?") And I can then explain why I do things the way I do and see if we can reach a compromise. Or you can always take me aside or have a conversation privately with me about things that are an issue for you when it comes to safety or any other topic about how I do things. And because My Friends and Family are INCREDIBLY important to me, I would be HAPPY to see if there is a way to help make us BOTH comfortable.... because I would LOVE to continue to have the people I care about feel comfortable and be a part of our home. ******************************************************** It was really interesting to me the other day when we were at Temple Square, to be sitting by the fountain, looking at the Temple and have a group of people walk over, take some pictures of eachother with the Temple as the backdrop, and then very bluntly mock and criticize how the Temple works. One of the things I believe The LDS Church is unfortunately good at, is allowing people to openly criticize their standards on their turf. But I just couldn't help but think that if you're going to mock, do it outside of the Church's buildings and property. And this is how I feel about MY home. Criticize all you want.... Somewhere else. If you choose, when I am at YOUR home, feel FREE to point out how much better your way of doing things is. But My Home is MY Temple. To worship how I choose. And to feel how I want to feel. People who can't show me THAT respect, will soon be hearing about it the moment they cross that line! I am DONE standing by and allowing it in My Home!!!

Vote Please

If you go This Link, and vote, I get an extra entry to win Lagoon passes..... PLEASE, and Thank you ;-) ♥

Latest Recommendations

Every so often I like to post about AWESOME deals/products that I find to be extraordinary. My latest kudos go to: *Happy Chappy: My Friend, Ivy, has started making all natural products like Body Butter and Lip Balm from essential oils. *Sisters Craft Corner: My Friend, Wendy, makes WONDERFUL crocheted products like Barefoot Sandals, Hats, Headbands, etc for Children. I own 3 pair of her Barefoot Sandals and a matching headband for one pair now. (look for her products on Etsy) *Slumber Parties: My Friend, Wendie, is a consultant. I use the Aftershave Protection Mist DAILY on My CHILDREN!!! Scrapes, diaper rash, sunburns... all treated with this spray do sooooo much better. Then there is their Between the Sheets bedding spray. LOVE it! I spray ALL of the beds, and our living room furniture with it!!! *Velata Fondue: Mmmmmmm! Chocolate! Need I say more?! I am now a Consultant for it.... get with me if you're interested. *Scentsy: Both of my SIL's have recently purchased or melted scents that I LOVE! Satin Sheets, Well Dressed Man, Fried Ice Cream.... along with Just Breathe are my current favs. Again, I am a Consutltant, so get with me if you're interested.

4 Years

It's been 4 years exactly this week since David and I separated on our way to divorce. WOW! 4 years, one divorce, one marriage, 2 kids later ;-) I Love My Life!!!!!

My Mom

SUCH a sensitive topic now days. I love her sooooo much. I was NOT the nicest or easiest daughter. I am a lot nicer to her now than when I was younger. I'm still not the easiest. But I cannot find the WORDS to express how much I appreciate her. She is everything I need in a MOM!!! She loved me for 20+ years of Hell, and loves me still after all I put her through. She NEVER gave up on me. And now, I know just how much I have ALWAYS ALWAYS needed her.

I am sooooo glad to be back in Utah to be close to her. Not just because she does so very very much for us, but because I want to be close to enjoy the time with her.

Love at Home

There is beauty all around,
When there’s love at home;
There is joy in ev’ry sound,
When there’s love at home.
Peace and plenty here abide,
Smiling sweet on ev’ry side;
Time doth softly, sweetly glide,
When there’s love at home;
Love at home, love at home,
Time doth softly, sweetly glide,
When there’s love at home.
In the cottage there is joy,
When there’s love at home;
Hate and envy ne’er annoy,
When there’s love at home.
Roses blossom ’neath our feet,
All the earth’s a garden sweet,
Making life a bliss complete,
When there’s love at home;
Love at home, love at home,
Making life a bliss complete,
When there’s love at home.

Kindly Heaven smiles above,
When there’s love at home;
All the earth is filled with love,
When there’s love at home.
Sweeter sings the brooklet by,
Brighter beams the azure sky:
Oh, there’s One Who smiles on high,
When there’s love at home;
Love at home, love at home,
Oh, there’s One Who smiles on high,
When there’s love at home.

Jesus, show Thy mercy mine,
Then there’s love at home;
Sweetly whisper I am Thine,
Then there’s love at home.
Source of love, Thy cheering light
Far exceeds the sun so bright—
Can dispel the gloom of night;
Then there’s love at home;
Love at home, love at home,
Can dispel the gloom of night;
Then there’s love at home.

Self Centered

In case u missed it this morning, My Maid of Honor (just giving u an idea of how dear this Friend WAS) asked on FB why I am so self centered. Why? Because I talk about what's going on with ME on there? Well, I took a little while to think it over, and have resolved to be LESS self centered. Unfortunatley, because that's what we DO on FB on our own Timelines, I will STILL be talking about MY life on there.... I will however, be trying to make sure in my actions and the way I circle through my existence and interactions, I am less self centered. I AM happy to report that along with self centered, I am also: Grateful, True, Involved, Smart, Prayerful, Humble, Clean, Positive, SOMETIMES Still, and others ON FIRE with a PASSION for life. Meanwhile, unfortunately, I removed my "Dear Friend" from my life. I don't need Friends who kick me when they know I'm down and struggling!!!!

I TRULY love my life!

I am happier today than I think I knew I could be. I thank God for the place I am at in my life, marriage and world.


Along with that, it is interesting to me to look in the mirror or at pictures of myself. I do not look inside the way I see myself when I see myself ;-)

And it's interesting to me. Especially since I have had such defined issues with my complexion lately. And people are reacting to the way I look more than I ever thought they would. People seem honestly surprised by the idea that I am animated, bubbly, and intelligent.

It's almost like the thought going throught their minds when they see me is: "If she looks like THAT, she must be someone who feels like crap about herself and is just existing."

Obviously this is MY interpretation.

But I LIKE me. I LIKE what I have to offer.... until I see what I look like on the outside. And it's enough to make me pause for a moment.

But not for long. I don't have time to spend too long on it. Because that's not really what I look like.

Dear Reader

After this post, make sure and read the post "Overwhelmed.... Again" BEFORE the "Dear...." ones. It'll make MUCH more sense!!!!

Just so you know, I went to the store with Jacob and Bella tonight. I put Bella (in her carrier) in the cart, and then "secured" the cart against my bumper so it wouldn't roll away while I got Jacob out of the car. After removing him from the car, I looked up to see a person of Hispanic decent who did NOT speak enough English to tell me what happened, walking toward me pushing the cart with My Baby in it. As MUCH as I HATE the "Masses" of his fellow Hispanics, I am so grateful for any and ALL of the people crammed into his SUV that had any role in his "catching" Bella as (i can only assume) she rolled down the parking lot (who knows how far she got) in the cart that I THOUGHT was stabily pressed against my car.

Then, when we got INSIDE the store. A woman of the same general race, reached out with absolutely NO provocation that I could find, and began touching Bella. I SAID "DO NOT TOUCH MY BABY!!!!" And SOMEHOW managed to walk away to fume vs BITING her or calling the police on her ;)

I made it home, took care of what I needed to for the Kids, and then as I soaked in the tub to unwind, i realized just how serious the situation with Bella in the parking lot COULD have been :( And really beacame emotional. Tonight I miss David EXTRA!

Dear Father

THANK YOU for sending someone to catch the cart as it rolled away with My Bella in it!!! THANK YOU for leaving her with us!!!!! ♥

Dear Walmart Customer who DOESN'T speak English

KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF!!!! It is such a BASIC concept. You are SOOOOO lucky I didn't BITE you!!!!!

Dear Josh Powell

You BASTARD! I almost lost my SWEET Baby tonight. And I would have been heart broken on a level that would never mend. And YOU have the NERVE to make the decision that your sons lives were over. How DARE you take them from those who loved and needed them. I didn't know enough to make a judgement on your guilt where your wife is concerned 2 days ago, but Gee you sure seem guilty now!!!

Many GOOD Christ following people are glad that you will have to suffer for what you did yesterday!!!! NOT glad you did it. Just that there is a "special" level of punishment for "People" (cringe) like you.

Dear Candace

You really bombed today with Bella. On the upside, you DID a lot right. However the one or two "wrongs" could have cost you your Baby! PLEASE learn your lesson and be more vigilant!!!! You're SO miraculously blessed tonight.

PS - Good job not being excessive in your reactions to those who cannot understand English or "Keep your hands to yourself!" You kept it short and to the point.... then walked away. Now BREATHE!

Dear Mr "Hero"

Thank you to you and all of the others with you who had a part in saving my Baby!!!! I am so gratful you were there. Forgive me for the fact that you Heroism doesn't fully excuse the fact that you don't speak English. People like you frustrate me so much. How could I ask you the questions I needed to in order to know the exact condition of things. But then, you DID make sure my Baby is safe in my love tonight. Thank you for that! Please learn english and become someone who can function successfully in this country you and your "Compadres" are taking over.

Dear Bella

I failed you in multiple ways today. And for that, I am so sorry! I SWEAR to do better. THANK YOU for staying with me! I hope you're ok. Xoxoxo!!!! ♥

Dear David

OMG!!!! Bella could have been killed tonight. And THEN some Woman had to further put her in danger by not having the decency to keep her hands to herself. I really miss you tonight, and you seemed WAY more interested in the Game :(

Overwhelmed... AGAIN!

So many thoughts and emotions. Heads up, the only way I know how to express them is to write "Letters" defining each situation. Here goes.

We are Young

Give me a second I
I need to get my story straight
My friends are in the bathroom
Getting higher than the Empire State
My lover he's waiting for me
Just across the bar
My seats been taken by some sunglasses
Asking 'bout a scar
And I know I gave it to you months ago
I know you're trying to forget
But between the drinks and subtle things
The holes in my apologies
You know I'm trying hard to take it back
So if by the time the bar closes
And you feel like falling down
I'll carry you home

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

Now I know that I'm not
All that you got
I guess that I
I just thought maybe we could find new ways to fall apart
But our friends are back
So let's raise a cup
Cause I found someone to carry me home

Tonight
We are young
So let's the set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

Carry me home tonight
Just carry me home tonight
Carry me home tonight
Just carry me home tonight

The world is on my side
I have no reason to run
So will someone come and carry me home tonight
The angels never arrived
But I can hear the choir
So will someone come and carry me home

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

Tonight
We are young
So let's set the world on fire
We can burn brighter
Than the sun

So if by the time the bar closes
And you feel like falling down
I'll carry you home tonight


************************************************

I've been playing this song in my head, singing it out loud around the house, and thinking over the lyrics.

And it made me realize just how much age is a state of mind. Tonight we ARE young. We can STILL set the world on fire.

I plan to be setting the world on fire for at LEAST 4 more decades, just like my Grandma.

What I need right now

David gave me a blessing before he left for Rock Springs tonight.

I was blessed to be able to give My Children my very best. And have the resources to care for them. That help is all around me.

I am so happy to feel that this new year is a new life for us. This new home is full of new hope!

One Nation Under God

Jon McNaughton

This painting brought tears to my eyes. I asked David if we could use some of our tax refund $ to buy it, and he was skeptical (it's not cheap). When he asked what made me want to buy it, I started crying and choked out "Because it makes me cry." He immediately agreed to the purchase. <3

Nearer My God to Thee

Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
E'en though it be a cross that raiseth me;
Still all my song would be nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!

Though like the wanderer, the sun gone down,
Darkness be over me, my rest a stone;
Yet in my dreams I'd be nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!

There let the way appear steps unto heav'n;
All that Thou sendest me in mercy giv'n;
Angels to beckon me nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!

Then with my waking thoughts bright with Thy praise,
Out of my stony griefs Bethel I'll raise;
So by my woes to be nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!

Or if on joyful wing, cleaving the sky,
Sun, moon, and stars forgot, upwards I fly,
Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!

******************************************

I have been blessed with the Gift if Empathy. My Patriarchal Blessing speaks of being able to share others joys and sorrows.

This is a painful, yet rich Gift to have.

Fortunately, it is a very God like, and Christ like quality when used correctly.

I can only imagine how painful it must be for the Savior to stand, hand open offering relief, love, joy, compassion and so many other gifts as people look at His outstretched hand, and say "No thank you. I'm fine on my own."

"I don't need the help. I don't need your hand outs. I don't need your thoughtfulness. I don't need your gifts."

I think many people are oblivious to what a slap in the face it is when someone offers service with a genuine heart, and it is declined over and over.

I may not have much to give, but what I have I give.

One of the conditions to our salvation is whether we fully became what we had the potential to become, or not.

What then, do you think it does for a person who has so much to give, but is never allowed the opportunity?

It makes them feel unfulfilled. It lowers their feeling of accomplishment. It lowers their feeling of worth.

It is a blessing for the person giving service, just as much as the person recieving service when it is allowed to be given.

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I am so far from perfect. I have so far to go. So much I need to perfect. So many changes to make.

But when I leave this testing ground, I look forward to at LEAST being able to say "I took every opportunity presented to me to help my Brothers and Sisters."

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I will forever be saddened and amazed at how many people will turn down dinner, compassion, friendship.